A New Year Ramble

2008 has come in full throttle.... I feel like I can't quite catch up to it. From Thanksgiving through New Years is a blur. Big family gatherings, birthdays, flu bugs, new jobs....all this and we've still only been here in Austin for just 5 months. No wonder I feel a bit out of breath and disoriented.

I have so many hopes and dreams for this coming year. They seem to be living expectantly just under the surface. I can't quite get to them at the moment, but I know they are there. I keep dreaming of spending a day in quite...candles lit....journal near by and lots of art materials... I sense this would help me uncover what my heart hears mumbling in the background. It will come, Epiphany may just be coming a little late for me this year.

2007 what a year--- I am blown away by all that the year held. The move was huge. Leaving the Bay Area after 10 years. Leaving friends who had become as close as family. Saying goodbye to where Katie spent her first years and where Mary made deep and lasting roots. A dear friend getting a difficult diagnosis reminding us that life is so fragile. Spending lots of time with family. Jane's father dying after such a long illness- all death is suprising and parents aren't supposed to die. Adjusting to Mary turning 20 and becoming more independent. I keep wondering when I will adjust to her being in college. Meeting the wonderful community- Journey Imperfect Fatih Community- I have been waiting to meet you for years. Moving into a home that just fits us like a glove. Enjoying the vibe of city living. Reconnecting with one of my dearest high school friends. Taking some big risks in terms of employment and not being too scared about it. Bob and I really enjoying each other and this new phase in our life. This year is one first times in my life where I could hold both the grief and the excitement from the events of the past year. They were both real and equally present. I think I bring these into 2008.

Spending the New Year in the Bay Area was so weird almost surreal. Our little town of San Carlos is a place where everyone knows everyone. In the first few hours we ran into lots of people. The guy who baked our pizza every Friday night. The kid from the soccer team that we wanted to avoid. The Batista at Starbucks. A good friend who didn't know we were in town. It was almost like looking back at a point in life through a new lens.

New Years with our dearest friends was like a great family reunion . It would have been a perfect 10 if Mary had been with us. We wondered how we would come back together but within moments Bob and Jon were talking sports, Jane and I in the kitchen drinking wine and talking a mile a minute. The kids had disappeared to the back room. One of my favorite moments was during dinner, Justin- age 11, kept saying "gosh I have missed you all." Right back at you ,Justin. New Years day was the best- spa treatments for us girls in the morning and then a wonderful outing to beach. We ended this perfect reunion with a little more football, pizza from Speederia, and big hugs until we meet again.

One of our blogger friends wrote his three words for 2007. This is kind of fun to me because each year at New Years my friend Jane gives each us a new pair of socks to wear when life is tough and in each sock is a word. My words last year were strength and clarity. Numerous times throughout the year I cussed getting strength. I'm tired of being strong and tough. Jane reminded me that I needed the word strength to move 1700 miles to the unknown. The words that represent 2007 for me are: transition, strength (i know it was true), possibility.

2007 you were good to me...so many doors gently closed, new doors with wide welcome signs appeared. And so my hope is that in the next few weeks I will have time to get quiet and hear what is possibly stirring in me for the coming year.

Blessings and peace to you as you move into this New Year!